Tuesday, March 21, 2006
I've moved not too long ago. Let's see if you can find me.
:0
It's not too hard, so if you can't, you're really stupid.
10:18 PM
Wednesday, March 15, 2006
I don't know what it's about, but..
I'm pretty....confused, maybe? I don't know what it's about..who it's about....
but just...y'know....
They're blind. Sometimes I think they are.
I don't know.....
It doesnt mean I like myself or what I'm doing.
Well....no one likes to be down all the time.....no one likes to feel like their abandoned.
Keh, well maybe...maybe I'm too much of an elitist....perfectionist....maybe a little of a snob when it comes to how a person thinks?
Well, I don't know. But I guess I just don't agree with anything she does.
I just don't agree on how people see her. I just don't agree when people think she's smart or anything. I'll be frank with that.
Yes...come to think of it, it could very well be jealousy. But it's an odd kind of jealousy, yes?
Oh for goodness's sake. If someone deems herself to be miserable all the time or seeks attention, you know she's got issues. Obviously, she doesn't want it that way. She's confused. And when she thinks back, she hates the way she's done it. I do feel that a lot of times. I feel this odd pang of regret whenever I recall myself doing soemthing so stupid to get attention or something like that. Come to think of it, I don't even know why I want attention. Yes....I do feel confused on this. The people around me don't get it either. In fact, they get annoyed with me for being so self-absorbed. I mean, when someone calls you 'self-absorbed' to the face, it feels really horrible. Sometimes I feel like I'm misunderstood at this point, because I DO care for people...it's just that I don't show it, or find it hard to show it....and I'm sometimes so self-absorbed beause I worry about so many things at once, I can't help but only think of myself. I guess sometimes I just don't really trust people. I guess I've never been comfortable around people I don't know well. I would just sit in the corner and do nothing when all the other kids played at my PAP kindergarden (thank goodness my parents transferred me out to kinderland after that).
U________________U I hate it that I'm typing this post. I feel like I'm degrading myself. THough that's techinically not the best word to use. I guess I feel like I'm actually going by what poeple say of me....by what I don't think is true....or maybe what is true but I just don't want to accept it.
Well. There's one thing I don't agree with entirely. I don't think I'm a bad friend. Not exactly...I mean I know I've done some things. Yes, I'll say it with conviction. Sometimes I feel that there's no-one there for me. When I had issues and I wanted to tell someone about them, it always just tumbled out weird, so I clamped up. And I guess, my hypersensitivity found it hard to accept when people seemed distanced or when they said something quite insensitive, even though they didn't mean it at all. My sensitivity is BOTH a blessing and a curse. Sometimes I feel it's more like a curse.
My parents are very supportive people. I have a very supportive family. Only sometimes they don't seem to know what makes me tick. It's like when I was listening to Kuuchuu Buranko and my mom said, "Hey...that sounds like She Bangs," which made me mad because to me, she was throwing an insult because....OMG COME ON RICKY MARTIN AND PLASTIC TREE?!?!?!? SERIOUSLY WTF??!??
Wow. That was really weird, because, all of a sudden, something just hit me, and I feel relieved. Maybe it was God. No, there's no sarcasm in that sentence. I just don't want to hate her anymore. It's a waste of my energy and I'll be with her on the Literature trip anyway. I always talk about how some people can be so judgemental and unaccepting, when sometimes I guess my mentality is like that. NO, I'm not admitting to being a hypocrite....I'm only saying that I should be going for what I stand for. I mean, hey, there're different sorts of people out there...and well...
Ah...we'll see. won't we? :>
12:21 PM
Tuesday, March 14, 2006
Math class. Medical appointment after that.
I've been told got an anxiety disorder. It's easily treatable, so they gave me some medication for that.
Yuuuuup.....
2:55 PM
Monday, March 13, 2006
I'm really tired nowwww....so if there's any stupid typo errors in here, do forgive me, please.
'Keedokee. I woke up at 7.45/52 today...took my own sweet time doing things, and rushed off to school at around 8.45 for my Art Trail thingy.
So we stopped first at the goat farm, after the bus uncle kept driving around in circles. We got to see the goats being milked and then the guy in charge ran throuhh some explanations about...something. The one thing I couldn't quite agree with them though, was their method of burning the young goats' horns off so they wouldn't injure the other goats...and stuff. o_o (I'm too tired to remember much) The kids were really cute but they LICKED MY DAMN FINGERS..which is really JUST NOT DONE. It felt all hot...and bubbly. o__o Their fur was quite coarse though, much to my surprise (I thought it would be all nice and soft).
Goat shit stinks really horribly, though. They don't attract flies, but they stink reeeeeally bad.
OOH the vegetable farm was up next. We got those weird icky veggie drinks...and it smelled PRETTY gross....but it wasn't too bad tasting, although I wouldn't reccomend you tasting it if you don't like the idea of drinking lettuce. It was nice, strolling through, if a bit boring and forgettable, under the hot midday sun, and the muffled drone of the old guide lady.
After that, we went off to have lunch a the INdian restraunt.
The food was pretty good, but I'm a girl who goes for a very simple palate, so all the flavours coming together in the rice didn't settle too well with me. I mean, I like it, bu it just wasn't much to my tastes. The lime juice was good, however, and I quite liked the chicken.
We were left to explore Little India after that, and then we did something really pointless and went somewhere else and I almost PUKED ON THE TRAIN BECAUSE I WAS SO FULLL AND THE TRAIN WAS JERKING BACK AND FORTH.
The art mueseum was really nice. I'll admit that I've never been to a gallery properly and looked at its art pieces. I have a few favourites in there. Oh, and the exhibition was on Asian cubism. I'd reccomend you to go see it.
UM KAY. I just realized I forgot what time I'm supposed to be at school tomorroooooow. NICE...real nice.
10:12 PM
Sunday, March 12, 2006
HAS SINGAPORE NO ORIGINALITY AT ALL?!?!?
I came home (yes I actually went out!! omg!!), rewound my tape to watch Gundam Seed Destiny, and then, right in front of me, one of the greatests examples of how unoriginal Singapore is unfolded before me.
Apparently, some kids channel is starting a spastic brand new series called "____ Wild Adventures". I don't know why the thought of the Wild Thornberries popped into my head then, but it did. I continued watching, my left eyebrow partly raised.
AND OOOOOOH HERE'S THE FUN PART:
The show's about a girl who can talk to animals.
I don't care about the whenever-she-sneezes-everything-turns-to-animation part that follows, because, well, I think it's pretty obvious it's a rip-off from an already present concept.
I might get sued for defamation, or whatever shit big-shots are sueing everyone these days, but I'm TELLING WHAT IS OBVIOUS AND RIGHT SMACK INFRONT OF YOUR FACE.
This is actually one of the many reasons why I am embarassed to be Singaporean.
6:54 PM
Saturday, March 11, 2006
MERRRRRRRRF.
I'll be shifting toooooooooooo:
cradleofsaturn.blogspot.com
OR
Jet-harkley.blogspot.com
I CAN'T FRIGGIN DECIDE. :D
11:21 AM
Friday, March 10, 2006
Whoopee. Its the last day of school.
Go and shoot yourself people.
My grades aren't horrible, but I failed my Maths. -curses- Assholes. D<
I made a private diary entry to myself yesterday. Sometimes I think it disturbs me...how I am.
Today was horrible because it started out horrible (I switched off the alarm clock thinking I'd be able to wake p a few minutes later; instead I woke up at 6:45. ~_~ NICE.)
Mrs Bhatia came back, and we got our seating arrangements re-arranged, and I was just almost doomed to a year (or at least a few months) of insufferable torture. GRAAAHHH!!! I cannot stand HER (NOT mrs bhatia...someone else). >_>; She's almost like a C.Y carbon copy. I escaped doom by switching places with Cheryl. I am now smack at the front of the class (Nice going, girl), with Grace, nonetheless. I can tell she's a bit more pissed and twitchy after yesterday. Wouldn't blame her though.
PE was almost a nightmare. As much as I am romanced by the idea of vampires, I still am quite nerved when Renaa yells that everytime I'm running back and forth on the basketball court.
I like bananas.
6:04 PM